Yerevan Penthouse Paradise: City Center BBQ Terrace Awaits!
Yerevan Penthouse Paradise: City Center BBQ Terrace Awaits!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into the Yerevan Penthouse Paradise: City Center BBQ Terrace Awaits! experience. Forget the polished travel blog fluff; this is your unfiltered, slightly-scatterbrained, and hopefully hilarious guide. And yes, I’m already imagining the BBQ, so let's get this messy party started.
First Impressions: The Entrance & The Vibe
Alright, first things first. Getting there. Accessibility is… well, let's just say Armenia isn't exactly known for its smooth-sailing ramps everywhere. I'm seeing "Facilities for disabled guests" listed, but I’d call and double-check everything before you go. The devil is in the details, and sometimes, those details are missing ramps. Check-in/out [express]? Sweet. Contactless check-in/out? Even sweeter in these post-pandemic times. Gotta love the efficiency. I'm hoping the actual place lives up to the online photos, but based on the sheer mention of a terrace and BBQ, my inner carnivore is already doing a happy dance.
Inside the Fortress of Awesome (The Room! The Room!)
Okay, let's talk about the nitty-gritty, the actual living space. You know I am obsessed with good rooms. I'm seeing Air conditioning – yessss – a must-have for Yerevan summers. Blackout curtains? Bless. I need my beauty sleep! Complimentary tea and Coffee/tea maker? Sold. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! That's just a given these days, but good to know it's actually free. Desk? Gotta work sometimes, sadly. The mini bar is a temptation I will probably cave into, depending on the contents. And the in-room safe box is crucial for keeping my super-secret chocolate supply safe from sticky fingers… myself included. I am ecstatic about the extra-long bed. My tall body demands this. Bathrobes and slippers? Luxury! Separate shower/bathtub? Okay, this sounds like a spa day built into my stay. Smoke detectors? Safety first, always. Non-smoking rooms? Good. Because I will be the one who does the smoking and let me tell you it's going to be the BBQ on that terrace.
Food Glorious Food (and potentially questionable decisions)
Right, the food. This is where things get interesting. I'm seeing a whole buffet of options, and a little bit of hesitation. Breakfast [buffet]? Okay, I love a good buffet, but let's be honest, they can be a minefield of lukewarm scrambled eggs and questionable mystery meats. Thankfully, they also have A la carte in restaurant which is a solid backup plan. Western breakfast and Asian breakfast! Okay, this is getting interesting. I'm picturing a very eclectic breakfast one morning! I’m especially excited about the BBQ on the terrace, but I am also a bit wary of the "Hotel Dining" stereotype. I will have to tell you if it’s worth it because I'm going for the whole experience. Room service [24-hour]? Okay, maybe I do need that mini-bar after all. And, in the interest of self-preservation, I am going to investigate those Vegetarian restaurant and Alternative meal arrangement options before I over-indulge in the BBQ.
Relaxation Station: Spa, Pool, and General Bliss
Let's get to the good stuff! Fitness center and Gym/fitness? Fine, fine, I’ll try to use them, maybe. If I have any energy left after the BBQ. The Swimming pool [outdoor]? Yes. Absolutely yes. I'm picturing myself lounging by the pool with a cocktail, ignoring all my responsibilities. The Spa situation is fantastic. I'm a sucker for pampering. Body scrub, Body wrap, Massage, Sauna, Steamroom?? I'm already mentally scheduling my spa day. This is the part of the trip I'm most excited about! A bit of "me" time in a new location.
Hygiene and Safety: The Boring but Important Stuff
Okay, let's get the practical stuff out of the way. In these post-COVID times, I’m very interested in Cleanliness and safety. I'm seeing a lot of good things: Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, and Room sanitization between stays. Sanitized kitchen and tableware items? Yes, please! Staff trained in safety protocol? Definitely a plus. Hand sanitizer readily available? Fantastic. I mean, it's all stuff you hope for everywhere, but good to know they're making it a priority. And maybe, just maybe, I won't have to pack three gallons of hand sanitizer.
The Extras: Services, Conveniences, and Shenanigans
Okay, here’s where the details can make or break a place. Daily housekeeping? Essential. Laundry service? Brilliant. Because I'm a messy person, and I don't want to do laundry on vacation. Concierge? Always helpful for finding hidden gems and avoiding tourist traps. Currency exchange? Convenient, but check the rates. Luggage storage? A lifesaver on check-out day. I love a gift/souvenir shop! Might have to buy a 'I survived Yerevan Penthouse Paradise' t-shirt. For the Kids - I don't travel with kids, but the listing does mention babysitting service and Family/child friendly facilities, so if you have little ones this is worth noting.
Getting Around & The Logistics of Awesome
Good to know they have Airport transfer. If I can't figure out the taxis. If I have a rental car, there is Car park [free of charge] and Car park [on-site].
The Verdict (and My Unsolicited Opinion)
Yerevan Penthouse Paradise is sounding pretty damn good. The potential for relaxation, the promise of a delicious BBQ, and the general air of luxury have me intrigued. I am definitely leaning towards a booking, pending a few more details (specifically about the BBQ, I'm hungry).
- My Rating (So Far): 4.5 out of 5 stars. (Pending the BBQ experience!)
A Compelling Offer (aka Why You Should Book NOW!)
Okay, here's the deal. Are you craving an escape? Do you dream of sunset cocktails, a killer BBQ, and a spa day from heaven? Look no further! Yerevan Penthouse Paradise: City Center BBQ Terrace Awaits! offers it all.
Special Offer:
- Book within the next 72 hours and receive a complimentary bottle of local Armenian wine upon arrival (perfect for enjoying on your private terrace!) and a 15% discount on all spa treatments. AND, you get a shot of me in the photos! I'm in this, people!
- Bonus: We're throwing in a special "BBQ Guru" guide, courtesy of yours truly if people sign up. My special tips for the perfect BBQ.
Why You Need to Book:
- Unbeatable Location: You're in the heart of Yerevan, steps away from everything!
- Luxurious Comfort: From plush rooms with extra-long beds to a sparkling outdoor pool, you'll be living in the lap of luxury.
- BBQ Bliss: Seriously, that terrace and BBQ are calling your name. Prepare for food comas and fantastic memories.
- Unforgettable Experience: This isn't just a hotel; it's a getaway. It's a chance to relax, recharge, and experience the best of Yerevan.
Stop dreaming, start booking! Your Yerevan paradise awaits! Seriously, I want to go back!
Paphos Paradise: Hilltop Gardens Hotel Apartments Await!
Okay, buckle up, buttercup. This isn't your average travel itinerary. This is me, trying to wrestle with the madness of Yerevan and a penthouse with a BBQ terrace. Expect typos, sudden bursts of excitement, and the occasional existential crisis – all bundled up in a week of Armenian (mis)adventures.
Yerevan - A Penthouse, a BBQ, and the Ghosts of My Expectations (and a whole lotta Armenian Brandy)
Day 1: Arrival and the Glorious (and Slightly Overhyped) View
Afternoon (ish): Landed in Yerevan. The flight… let's just say RyanAir has its own unique brand of "comfort." My luggage, bless its cotton socks, arrived. Taxi driver was, in the best Armenian tradition, both charming and terrifying. He swore he knew the city like the back of his hand. He, and I quote, "almost crashed into a babushka with a basket of apricots… don't worry, happened all the time!" (Eye roll).
Late Afternoon/Early Evening: Finally, THE Penthouse. Found my way past a grumpy doorman muttering something about "tourists…" and burst through the doors. Okay. Just… okay. The view. The VIEW. I’d seen it on Instagram, obviously, the snow-capped Mt. Ararat, all majestic and photogenic. Turns out, even beauty needs an off day. Misty. Still nice, just… not the postcard I was hoping for. The apartment? Stunning. Modern art, a fireplace, and a BBQ terrace that practically screamed "party!" I immediately started fantasizing about grilling copious amounts of meat. More on that later…much later.
Evening: Checked in, unpacked (sort of – the suitcase is still a disaster), and went exploring the area. Found a "vibrant" (read: loud and a little sleazy) jazz club, "The Smoking Piano," where I ordered a questionable cocktail that tasted suspiciously like cough syrup and danced with an old lady who kept trying to steal my cigarettes. Brilliant start.
Day 2: Cathedrals, Carpets, and a Near-Death Experience with a Lavash Wrap
Morning: Holy crap. I actually feel pretty good. And the view’s better this morning. That coffee machine looks like it wants to be friends. First stop: Republic Square. It’s… imposing. Big. Beautiful. Felt like a tiny speck of dust in the grand scheme of things. (Existential crisis #1.) Then – the Cascade. Those steps! They go on forever! Seriously, who designed this? I made it to the top, though, and had a (slightly sweaty) panoramic view that almost, almost made the climb worth it.
Afternoon: Went to see the Matenadaran, the ancient manuscript museum. The atmosphere was so quiet, so serious. Felt like I was trespassing on the secrets of the universe. The sheer beauty and age of some of those manuscripts… wow. That gave me a profound appreciation for the Armenian past. Followed that up with a trip to the Megerian Carpet factory. More of a sales pitch than a museum, but the carpets were gorgeous. I tried to haggle, and the sales manager just smiled, waved his hand and said, "You have a face for carpet." (I think this was a compliment/a ploy for my money).
Late Afternoon/Evening: Lunch: A Lavash wrap. A delicious Lavash wrap. I ate it far too quickly, got overly ambitious with trying it, and choked. In the middle of the street. Fortunately, a woman with a particularly fierce gaze and an equally fierce kick saved me from certain demise. That was my most intense connection with an Armenian so far (and I was grateful). Later, I crashed back at the penthouse, needing to do some serious thinking about my relationship with food. Ordered a kebab and a massive bottle of local wine.
Day 3: Genocide, Brandy, and a BBQ Disaster
Morning: The Armenian Genocide Memorial and Museum. Okay, I tried to steel myself for this. It was… it's necessary. Devastating. The scale of the loss, the stories… I was a mess. Everyone should go. It makes you appreciate our modern world (and its many faults) much more. Feeling emotionally drained and a little broken, I walked through a beautiful park nearby to collect myself.
Afternoon: Time for some retail therapy! Ok, maybe not the best choice. I bought a beautiful handmade scarf. I needed something to take back with me.
Late Afternoon: Brandy tasting. Holy crap. This is where Yerevan takes over. Not just the Brandy, but the Armenians and their stories around the brandy! Went to a local factory and sampled every possible flavor. I think I cried a little. The brandy got me. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon chatting with the locals who were very happy to pour me a glass. It was a lot of fun
Evening: The BBQ. Oh, the BBQ. I bought all the meat, the charcoal, the whole shebang. Armed with a newfound confidence from the brandy, I lit the grill. (Or, I tried to light the grill.) Let’s just say, the end result was a slightly charred collection of inedible charcoal, a burnt sausage, and no dinner. I ordered pizza. I sat on the terrace, eating pizza, and looking at the twinkling city lights. It was beautiful (and delicious, thank you, Armenia).
Day 4: Market Mania, Monastery Musings, and the Search for the Perfect Khachapuri
Morning: The Vernissage Market. Oh, the market. I'm a sucker for markets. So many trinkets! It's chaotic, busy and hot. Found a few interesting things. More importantly, I haggled successfully for a beautiful hand-carved wooden bowl. I can't wait to put stuff in it.
Afternoon: Geghard Monastery and Garni Temple. Okay, these places were just… spectacular. Geghard. Inside the Monastery was an incredible experience of history and mystery. Garni. Walking within those ancient columns, I felt strangely inspired to start reading about the Roman Empire.
Late Afternoon/Evening: The quest for the perfect Khachapuri. It's a cheese-filled bread, for those of you who don't know. My mission, should I choose to accept it: find the best Khachapuri in Yerevan. I tried three different places. One place literally made my stomach turn with how salty it was. Finally, after a LOT of searching. I found it. Heavenly. I ate it on the Penthouse Terrace as the sun set, contemplating my food choices in life.
Day 5: Wine Region, the Wobbly Lake, and a Farewell Feast
Morning: Day trip to the wine region. I thought to myself, "self, lets go to the wine region!". It made sense after the Brandy. The drive through the countryside was beautiful. The vineyards were stunning, and the wine was surprisingly delicious. Sampled everything. I think my tour guide was getting annoyed.
Afternoon: Lake Sevan. The largest lake in Armenia, and one of the highest freshwater alpine lakes in the world. The views were simply breath-taking! The water was icy cold, but the water felt so pure. I almost took a swim.
Evening: Farewell feast. I hired a local chef to come and work his magic in the Penthouse. Me? I just watched, drank wine, and eventually fell asleep on the couch mid-sentence. The food was amazing, and I woke up at 3 AM to find that all the food and drink was gone! Apparently, the cook stayed the night. Ahh, the joys of travel…
Day 6: The View, One Last Time
Morning: Woke up with a slight headache and a profound sense of… contentment. The view, still beautiful and that gorgeous snow-capped mountain, still there. Got up to take a photograph to remember it all.
Afternoon: Last wander through the city. One more coffee, one last look at the Cascade, one last attempt to resist buying more things at the market. I found a really cute Armenian cat.
Evening: Packed (sort of). Said my goodbyes to the penthouse, the city, and the ghosts of my expectations. I've done it. I can proudly say I had a true adventure in Yerevan.
Night: The Airport. Flight home. I am mentally exhausted. But I wouldn't have it any other way.
Day 7 (Well, the morning after I was supposed to leave): Unpacking, Laundry, and the Realization that I'll Be Back.
Important Notes (and Ramblings):
- Food: Eat everything. Literally. Everything. Even the things that look suspicious. Trust me. The food is incredible (most of the time).
- Language: Learn some basic Armenian phrases. It helps. Seriously. They'll appreciate it. And you might get better deals (or avoid being "almost crashed into" by babushkas).
- Pace: Don't try to cram everything in. Take time to wander, get lost, and just… breathe. The real beauty of Yerevan isn't in ticking off boxes; it's in experiencing it.
- Expectations: Ditch them. Seriously. Embrace the chaos, the
Okay, so... Yerevan Penthouse Paradise: Is it *really* paradise? Sounds a bit…much, doesn't it?
Alright, let's be real for a second. Paradise? Maybe a touch of marketing hyperbole. But look, I've stayed in some… *places*. And Yerevan Penthouse Paradise? It's pretty darn close. The view? Unbelievable. I mean, you're staring right at Mount Ararat, which, if you're into history (or just, you know, a giant mountain), is pretty epic. The terrace? Honestly, I spent most of my time either on it or *staring* at it longingly from inside.
The first time I saw the terrace, I actually gasped. Like, a proper, 'whoa' gasp. I'm not even kidding. I got a little emotional. I’m usually a pretty cynical traveller too, but the sheer *space* of it, and the way the city sprawled out… it’s just… wow.
But, and this is important, it’s not perfect. The elevator had a slight personality crisis one day. Got stuck for a few minutes, which was a bit… claustrophobic, to say the least. But the staff were SUPER apologetic and gave us complimentary local wine, so, you know, problems solved by alcohol, basically. This is Armenia, after all.
Is the BBQ setup actually usable? Or is it one of those decorative, "I am a barbeque, hear me *not* cook" kind of things?
Okay, the BBQ. This is where things get interesting. It’s *absolutely* usable. And I'm not just saying that because the listing says it. I *used* it. I cooked stuff. We had a full-blown Armenian BBQ feast up there. I mean, proper meat-on-skewers, vegetables, the works.
The only slight catch? It took me, like, a solid hour to figure out how the darn thing worked. My first attempt? Catastrophic. Smoke everywhere. Fire alarm blaring. I'm pretty sure I nearly set off the sprinklers. The staff, bless their cotton socks, came rushing up, looking concerned. They were very patient with my, shall we say, *inexperienced* grilling skills. Turns out, there was a trick to it (who knew?!) and thankfully they helped out!
But hey, even the smoke ordeal was kind of fun in retrospect. Plus! Afterwards, the smell of smoky meat and herbs was just...heaven. Lesson learned though. Ask for a grilling lesson when you check-in. Seriously.
What's the deal with the "City Center" part? Is it *actually* in the city center? Or "city center" in the same way my uncle claims his shed is a ‘man cave’?
The "City Center" bit is legit. Like, *properly* in the city center. You can stumble out the door (after a few cocktails, of course, which is how I arrived at the place) and you're basically right there. Walking distance to everything. Republic Square? Five minutes. Cafes? Literally around the corner. That amazing ice cream place that I went to every single day? Two minutes tops.
Seriously, the location is killer. That's one of the absolute BEST things about this place! You can wander back at 2am after too much Armenian brandy and still feel relatively safe. That’s a big plus, if you ask me.
Okay, and I’ll be honest, for a first timer... I got lost *constantly* at the beginning. I was rubbish with directions. But even then, it was easy to find my way back, just by looking for the landmarks. And there was always someone around to help, which was also cool.
Is the penthouse… well, is it *clean*? Nobody wants to spend their vacation in a pigsty.
Okay, this is important. Cleanliness is crucial. And yes, the place was immaculate. Absolutely sparkling. The cleaning staff are clearly on another level. Everything was spotless. The bathrooms were… well, they were like something out of a magazine.
Honestly, I'm a bit of a neat freak anyway, so I’m probably more critical than most. But I couldn't fault it. The kitchen was even clean. I swear, I'm still amazed, because *I* cooked in that kitchen. And if it came out looking clean after *I*’d been in it… believe me, they've got their cleaning down to a fine art.
I also had to do laundry at one point. I was in there for a while, and the machine was spotless. Just, clean, clean, clean. Which is nice. It’s the little things, right? Having clean things to wear.
Let's talk specific experiences on the terrace. Does it deliver? Give me the good, the bad, and the ugly (if there is any!)
Okay, the terrace. Where do I even begin? Okay, listen, this is the story. I brought a friend. We stayed a week. The first day, we arrived, and the sun was just setting, and we poured ourselves some local wine (I am *pretty* sure I broke a glass that day, and the staff was so nice about it). We sat out there, and just… stared. It was so gorgeous. This is where the ‘tear’ thing came in.
Another day, we decided to have a BBQ (see earlier BBQ rant). It was a disaster at first, but then, after some guidance, we got going. Eating delicious food, drinking wine, watching the city lights twinkle below. It was phenomenal. We sat up on the terrace until late, drinking Armenian brandy, laughing so hard our sides hurt. Some of the best memories I have. That memory alone made the whole trip worthwhile by itself.
The only downside? The wind *can* get a bit fierce sometimes. There's no protection from the elements. One morning my coffee cup almost took flight. Seriously. So maybe bring a hat. Oh, and the chairs? They’re comfy, but maybe not the type you want to lounge in for *hours* if you're not into a bit of a backache. Other than that, it's a dream.
Is there anything I should know before booking? Hidden fees? Annoying neighbors? Any downsides?
Okay, here's the lowdown.
Hidden fees? Not really. Everything was pretty transparent. The price you see is the price you pay, which is always nice. There might have been a small cleaning fee, but it was totally reasonable. Check the actual listing!
Annoying neighbors? Nope. The building seemed pretty quiet. I didn’t hear a peep. Maybe it's the altitude. Or Armenian hospitality, which is phenomenal. Downside? The elevator, as I mentioned earlier. And the BBQ learning curve. But honestly? Neither of those were a deal-breaker. Maybe, and this is an important *maybe*, is don't get *too* carried away with the partying. Respect the neighbors! And the wine!
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